July 11, 2017

Yes, I know! I’m writing about dating AGAIN, and you are probably sick of hearing about it by now because you're either A.) Single and enduring this nightmare yourself or B.) In a relationship and/or married and unable to comprehend the struggle that the rest of us single people face with finding our soulmate.  But I just couldn’t help myself.  You see, for reasons that make me look like a total creeper, I recently went though all of my old messages in my OkCupid inbox, and first let me say that there are a lot of freakshows living in this city, as I’m sure you are all aware of by now.  Second...

June 28, 2017

Knowledge is power and the internet is unlimited knowledge, so naturally, because these days no one can get their face off of their computer monitors, phones and iPads, we are all essentially very powerful beings. Except for some reason, we have chosen to use the internet to learn about things that contribute nothing, and I mean literally nothing to our intellect and existence. At least I have. So for your amusement, I have compiled a list of useless questions I have searched the web far and wide to answer for no reason other than to be able to sleep at night because I just cannot live with th...

February 28, 2017

Alright team hunker down cause this is going to be a long one.  As previously stated in our first blog post, Fernanda is the married mess and I am the single mess. But let’s get real, “mess” is putting it lightly.  I’m totally fucked in the dating department, and have been since the time my first prom date stood me up at the age of 15 because “he didn’t have pants.”  I mean, who wouldn’t want to go out with this hottie? Am I right?!  Ha ha!

Now, I know that everyone thinks they have the craziest dating stories, but I can assure you that I am actually THE QUEEN of online...

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August 22, 2017

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Macee (left), Fern (right)


Two bitches in Los Angeles. Macee (left), Fernanda (right)


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