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August 22, 2017

Hi my name is Macee Binns, and I am now homeless because I bought a stripper pole from China.  Let me explain...

First of all, it should be known that I LOVE my apartment. After I received a notice last September that they were raising my rent at my old place in Hollywood yet AGAIN, I decided that I had no choice but to move. One very important thing that you should know about me is that I absolutely despise moving, and feel as though everyone should kiss my ass and shower me with pity for being faced with the horrific task of taking my shit from it’s current location and placing it in a n...

July 18, 2017

I had a stupid Macee moment this week. Which reminded me of the embarrassingly stupid Macee moment I had a couple of years ago. Which reminded me of the worlds all time stupidest Macee moment that I experienced during college. Which reminded me that my stupid Macee moments are inherited from my mother, Jana.  Now let me explain...

I do, in general, consider myself to be a smart person. I mean, I’m no brain surgeon or anything, but I did figure out how to write this blog, and I have managed to survive the past 20-some-odd years without accidentally maiming myself to the point of d...

July 11, 2017

Yes, I know! I’m writing about dating AGAIN, and you are probably sick of hearing about it by now because you're either A.) Single and enduring this nightmare yourself or B.) In a relationship and/or married and unable to comprehend the struggle that the rest of us single people face with finding our soulmate.  But I just couldn’t help myself.  You see, for reasons that make me look like a total creeper, I recently went though all of my old messages in my OkCupid inbox, and first let me say that there are a lot of freakshows living in this city, as I’m sure you are all aware of by now.  Second...

June 28, 2017

Knowledge is power and the internet is unlimited knowledge, so naturally, because these days no one can get their face off of their computer monitors, phones and iPads, we are all essentially very powerful beings. Except for some reason, we have chosen to use the internet to learn about things that contribute nothing, and I mean literally nothing to our intellect and existence. At least I have. So for your amusement, I have compiled a list of useless questions I have searched the web far and wide to answer for no reason other than to be able to sleep at night because I just cannot live with th...

June 13, 2017

As many of you know Fernanda and I are huge reality TV junkies, and the trashier the show the better cause I just love a good cat fight! Which is why I haven't been too excited by this anticlimactic season of The Bachelorette

But I will spare you my thoughts on that for today because one thing that most of you are not aware of is that, during my former acting days, I had some close calls with appearing on a few different reality TV shows myself. Filming these shows was a dramatically entertaining experience to say the least. So here is the complete breakdown of my traumatic events on reality...

June 7, 2017

Howdy Tiny Ass Fans! It is 2 in the freaking morning on a Tuesday and I am sitting alone in my living room, with a glass of wine, my dog and leftover pasta. Why am I up you might ask? Because a) It’s my turn to blog this week and up until 20 min ago, I thought I had nothing to write about, but then I remembered that, b) I am an expert procrastinator and c) because I just watched Wonder Woman, d) I have decided that I want to tell you all about the many wonders of being a woman. Although I am slightly underwhelmed by the movie, it did remind me of one thing: being a woman is awesome, and it als...

May 31, 2017

This post is for those of you who, like us, did not grow up thinking, “Dear God, please let me spend 40 hours a week trapped at a snooze of a desk job where I am under-paid and rarely appreciated.” If you are a fellow office dweller then you probably already know first hand that the curse of working said desk job is EXTREME BOREDOM. When you’re stuck at the office for hours on end and have finished all of your work related tasks, you often find yourself with nothing left to do but twiddle your thumbs as you wait for the clock to strike head-home-time, and you are forced to find creative ways t...

May 24, 2017

I’m not an expert in online dating, money, sports, politics, or a lot of other things that seem to be common knowledge to some of you. But I am certain that I can give you the best advise on what to binge watch when you are having one of those days where you just cannot face the world, want to lock yourself in your apartment, sit in your underwear on the couch, eat some junk food, and have your only companion be your dog (or a plant) and play detective; because that’s like every other day for me (sigh). I’m not a Law and Order/ Criminal Minds kind of gal, but man, am I obsessed with twisted do...

May 16, 2017

If anyone were to ever ask me, “Hey Macee, What were you doing on New Years 2006?” I could say without hesitation or shame “I was watching the Rock, Paper, Scissor Championships on ESPN with my Grandpa.”

You see, that New Years I can vividly recall getting dressed to go meet my friends and my now ex-boyfriend at a party, when I walked into the living room to show the love of my life, my Poppie, my new New Years Eve cocktail dress.  I was like…“Hey Poppie, what’s that on the TV?” And he turned to me and said, “It’s the stupidest thing! Can you believe they have a Rock, Paper, Scissor Championshi...

May 9, 2017

Hello again and let me begin by saying sorry. I have kept all of you out of the loop, but trust me, that's only because I can't even understand what the hell is going on in my life right now. All I know is it's been a long couple of months and I have abandoned my tiny ass partner in crime, Macee. Although I can't say I regret that because we've seen some epic posts from her lately... but I'm BACK! 

This time, I come to you from sunny Miami Beach, Florida of the United States of Amerrrca. But before I get into detail about why I am in Miami and jet lagged AF, can I just say, has flying become an...

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August 22, 2017

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Macee (left), Fern (right)

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Two bitches in Los Angeles. Macee (left), Fernanda (right)

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